08/11/20

All my friends are here,

The sparrows
The great tits,
The magpie.

They sing about their day,
They ask for more rice,
They praise their creator

I feel like waving at them,
I feel like hugging them,
I feel like calling them,

But I don’t.

One wrong move,
One wrong stance,
One wrong word,

and they will fly away.

Like you.

But there’s a breeze…

And in a flutter,
They return.

And with a tweet,
They return.

And with a peck,
They return.

Just like you.

The trees are bare.
The walls are silent.
The ground is cold.

When they are gone.
When you are silent
When I am alone.

Alone, so alone.

I don’t miss the crowds.
I don’t miss the roars.
I don’’t miss the chatter.

I miss,
Flesh and bones.

I miss
Warmth and truth.

I miss,
Soul and heart.

You,
and the birds.

You,
but not them.

You.
and not people.

I never tell you,
I never reveal to you,
I never show to you,

How much I miss your presence.

Too afraid of your flight.
Too afraid of your fright.
Too afraid of your fears.

Will they push me away?
Will they send me away?
Will they lock me away?

As you watch silently.

I don’t listen to those fears.
I don’t listen to those lies.
I don’t listen to those ghosts.

I greet my friend with a smile.

They flitter by.

Flickering golden leaves on the ground.
Finishing the last crumbs of my lunch.
Fluttering the thin branches of my cherry tree.

How gentle,
How soft,
How sweet!

I tend my hearth.
I tend my hurts.
I tend my heart.

And sweep the crumbles leaves away.
And dig out the tiny radishes from the earth.
And root in garlic for next summer.

Wrapped in my own melody.

The sun filters through the tattered curtain of foliage-
The sun filters through the tangled curtain of my hair.
The sun filter through the misty curtain in my mind.

That evanescent glow,
That fading glow,
That precious glow,

makes me rise and dance.
makes me glimmer and grow.
makes me dream and hope.

The beauty of a quiet autumn afternoon.

I wish,
I pray,
I hope,

to spend it with you.

Will the chirps make you want to dance?
Will the golden sunset make you want to sing?
Will the shivering trees make you want to hold me?

These are the questions I can never ask.

So I tell my friends,

The red breasted robin,
The woodpecker,
The swallows.

Maybe in a season or two,

A bird will perch on your shoulder.
A bird will peck at your window.
A bird wills settle in your beard

and lull you with a melodious confession.

19/10/20

Truth belongs to the patient
Truth belong to the resilient
Truth belong to the constant

Deeply buried under the earth
Deeply buried under the ice
Deeply buried under the ashes

Truth waits…

To that hunter that waited forever under the ice.
for justice

To that princess that waited forever under the sand
for love.

To those lovers that waited forever under the earth
for absolution.

Lost
Forgotten
Found.

Yet a mystery until the last day…

For what do we know of the time
when these valleys were embracing glaciers?

For what do we know of the time
when humanity was a speck in a never-ending tundra?

For what do we know of the time
when those now forgotten lands sung with triumph?

Pieces
Dust
Embers.

And so many theories held as truth
And so many history books held as truth
And so many mythical legends held as truth.

Until the turn of the tide.

A new storyteller
A new weaver
A new jester

creates an empire of gold and ashes.

Have you travelled through those roads?
Have you travelled through those passes?
Have you travelled through those bridges?

And felt…

Soft tendril
Distant flickers
Muted echoes

The past is forgotten
The past is fragmented
The past is ever returning.

Like the waxing and waning of the pearl
Like the rise and fall of the golden phoenix
Like the surge of light and death within a maiden.

Pulsating
Vibrant
Warm

Life.

What lives,
never die.

What dies,
always return.

What lives and dies,
tell the truth.

Did you see?
Did you hear?
Did you understand?

Patience,
Let your heart beat.

Patience,
Let your mind breathe.

Patience,
Let your soul beam.

Soar,
Glide,
Rise…

Do you see it now?

The season of the continents,
Ever shifting.

The season of the planets,
Ever transforming.

The season of the atoms,
Ever remembering.

Like a dance,

Twirl
Turn
and whirl.

Words are never erased,
from a paper.

Hovels are never raised
to the ground.

Hopes are never cast,
to the seas –

Without returning.

A chimera.
A ghoul,
A ghost…

A reminder.
A secret.
A spell.

Written within the bark of a tree.
Whispered in an ice core
Weaved in thick amber.

For those who see
For those who seek.
For those who feel…

The echoes of your last breath.
The reverberation of your precious life.
The melody of the Truth within you.

Centuries ago.
Millenniums ago.
Ages and ages ago.

And now buried in time.

Until the land rocks and slides.
Until the ice breaks and melts.
Under the seas recede and boil over.

Truth remains,
Until the end of the times.

16/10/20

To understand the meaning of a trail of feathers
To glimpse the knowledge of the falling leaves
To read the temperament of a cloudy sky

In the secret of a brave kernel.
In the litany of a lost owl
In the cracked tree trunk

There is an undecipherable knowledge.

A knowledge heavier than these books
A knowledge more precious than a diploma
A knowledge older than your crumbling walls.

I thread gently

Through the wind beaten forest
Through the time carven valley
Through the water thirsty river bed.

Wordless stories
Numberless ages
Outlawed paths.

They try, oh they do try,
Don’t they?

To write theories
To memorize forrmulas.
To define laws.

Fragile hands,
Tired minds
Failing eyes,

Tarnishing plastic
Blurring fumes
Cypher tumors.

What do they truly know?

Of depthless abysses?
Of timeless galaxies?
Of endless species?

Cross out that word
Rewrite that paragraph
Reframe this theory.

Words,
Numbers,
Pixels.

Dust in the wind,
Tinsels in the wind
Radiation in the wind.

Drink deep that knowledge,

Until you canot breathe.
Until you cannot see.
Until you cannot think.

What of the feather at your feet?
What of the scent on your lips?
But what of the judd in your fingernail?

Did you listen?
Can you still hear?

The warning…

In bacteria who survived in the melting ice.
In the water who remembers those interglacial heights.
In the dried out bark that faces bravely the bitter winds.

Every night,
The owls wonders why.

Every morn,
The pink dawn wonders how.

Every eventide,
The vine wonders when.

It will come,
it must.

Come and go.
Leave and return.
End and start.

The turn of the tide.
The end of an age.
The beginning of the cycle.

On and on

The swirling orbs

Small and immense
Slow and fast,
Cold and hot;

Tell us of the never-ending dance.

The spiraling destinies,
The encircling doom.
The rotating pathways.

Up and up,
Down and down –

Yet,

you remain enamored of your plastic dreams.
you remain enclasped in your toxic adventures
you remain enclosed in your poisoned walls.

Never knowing
Never caring
Never living.

Dead before the end of the stories.
Dead before the beginning of the chapter.
Dead before the climax of this tale.

Come,
Take my hand.

Come,
Hear our song,

Come,
Feel your earth.

Earth,

Where all stories begin
Where all songs end,
Where all destinies remember.

Earth,

Plant your feet deeply,
Anchor your fingers deeply,
Breathe deeply.

And remember,
And awaken,
And be free…

Like the chittering sparrows
Like the twirling leaves
Like the twinkling daisies.

Frail
Ephemeral,
And forever free…

15/10/20

The tree is long gone

But the seedling remains
But the flames remain
But the ashes remain

Burning,
Glowing,
Warming.

It’s the campfire,
The lone candle,
That first spark

Like a kiss never tasted
Like a word never spoken
Like an embrace never felt.

Here,
yet never here.

Ghosts,
Hopes,
And dreams

Are all the same.

They exist in the roaring wind
They exist in the gushing rain
They exist in the snapping banches –

And the wind,

Blows,
Blows
And blows.

So many voices in each gust
So many hopes in the cascading leaves
So many thoughts in the wavering branches.

Some bend,
Some waver,
Others break.

Which one am I?
Which one are you?
Which ones is our love?

Or is it still an acorn?
Or is it already digested?
Or were we too green when we fell?

There’s a knight that wanders
There’s a traveler that lingers
There’s a lost boy that wonders

He dreams of a fairy maiden…
He dreams of a homely wife…
He dreams of a loving lover…

He dreams
as strongly as the wind blows.

He dreams
as gently as the leaves scatter.

He dreams
as deeply as these roots seek.

Until she turned to him, and told him,

You are in my dreams,
You are in my prayers,
You are in my heart.

The branch falls in the mud
The twigs slapped the trunk.
The acorns spattered on the asphalt.

So much for the dream….

Reality stands tall
Reality reaches high
Reality draws deep.

An oak tree.

Reality….

There are no knights nor fairies,
There are no traveller and nor wife
There are no young and fresh lovers.

There is you
There is me.
Here we are…

Every line,
Every feather,
Every crack…

As imperfect as reality.
As real as true beauty.
As imperfect as true beauty

An acorn,
A seedling,
A shell,

… Hope.

24/08/20

The wind blows through the trees.
The breeze flows through my hair.
The air travels through our distance.

The mountains are high and mighty.
The mountains are distant and craggy.
The mountains are steep and rugged.

Yet my gaze is forever locked.

The waves are fierce and deep.
The waves are gentle and soft.
The waves are constant and strong.

Yet your gaze is locked.

The horizon is a wavering line

Pink hues
Golden dust
Deep blue.

I cannot see you
Yet i see you.

I cannot touch you
Yet i sense you.

I cannot hold you
Yet I cling to you,

Birds flutter by,
Chirps whistle by,
Feathers drop by.

Like messages
Like mementos
Like whispers.

Are you here?
I am here.

Love is a gentle bruise.
Love is a cold salve.
Love is what cannot be said.

Those who have built for themselves a high tower.
Those who have carved for themselves high windows.
Those who have weaved for themselves high curtains.

The lonely,
The hardy,
The silent,

Those who built a refuge that could withstand high winds…

Have an inner warm glow.
Have a gentle soft heart.
Have delicate dreams.

No winds,
No tempest,
No frost

can make their fortress crumble.

But one word,
But one shoot,
But one sprout,

And the foundation can crack.
And the walls can collapse,
And the door can be unhinged.

One word,
And I am yours.

One word,
And you are mine.

One word,
And you are gone.

Will you return my love?

Ask the ruins,
Ask the waves,
Ask the silence,

Will you return my love?

Alpenglow,
Frosted peaks,
Gentle slopes,

Will you return my love?

16/08/20 – timeless

When waves of human love confuse me
When winds of human rage ensnare me
When fumes of human desire bewitch me

I can no longer breathe deeply.
I can no longer hear deeply.
I can no longer love deeply.

And I wonder,
And I wander,
And I wound her.

The soul within me,
The heart within me,
The light within me

Are wounded
Are dulled
Are rusted.

Wounded.
Blinded.
Confused.

There’s a stir within me
There’s a spark within me
There’s a call within me.

That can never be lost.

As I feel the warm ground beneath my feet.
As I hear the gentle chirp of the sparrows above my head.
As I smell the teardrop in the air around my body.

I find that pathway….

Through the woods,
Through the clearing,
To the cabin

Where the fire never dies.

Yesterday I shivered.
Yesterday I heaved.
Yesterday I whispered.

What will happen to me

Once, this gentle love is soothed.
Once this gentle touch has vanished.
Once this gentle grasp has faded.

Will I return to myself?
Will I return home?
Will I return to You?

For returning I must…

I cannot sense You.
I cannot hear You.
I cannot hold You,

I cannot be regenerated by Your Light.

How afraid I was yesterday…

Yet today,

The waves,
The winds,
The fumes

all faded.

The sparrows are pecking.
The doves are cooing,
The woodpeckers are seeking.

What I already have.
What I never lost.
What I always keep…

Your Presence.

It was only my heart that was too loud.
It was only my mind that was too loud.
It was only the world that was too loud.

It all recedes

When I seek for you.
When I call for you.
When I reach for you.

From all my being.

Body
Heart
Soul.

All for my all.
My all for All.
All.

You are The Source of all Love.
You are The Source of all Light.
You are the Source of all Life.

They may come,
They may leave.

They may love,
They may hate.

They may try,
They may give up.

But you were the First.a
But you are the Constant.
But you will be the Last.

Destination,
Refuge,
Home.

The sparrows,
The raindrops
And even the airplane

Sing your praise.

The tired soil
The weakened trees
The faltering roses

All long for Your Mercy.

That You pour on us,

Drop after drop,
Wave after wave,
Cloud after cloud.

16/08/20

How is it that once

You were but a name.
You were but a face.
You were but a greeting

And now

You are the foundation of my day.
You are the shelter in my storms
You are the castle in my ruins.

How can it be

That when you walk away
When you turn away
You glance away

My heart crumbles?

Hot and cold
Cold and hot

Do you know what happens to your beloved mountains

When the weather is

Hot and cold
Cold and hot

The timeless glaciers crumble
Bit by bit
Chunk by chunk.

Changing the landscape forever.

Gorging up the rivers.
Eating up the villages.
Tearing off the trees.

Water,
Snow,
Ice.

And yet,

In water we are reborn.
In water we are cleanse.
In water we are sheltered.

Tears.

I can never say enough.
I always say too much.

Words, words, words,
No touch.

There are three of you :

The one I speak to in the day.
The one I dream of in the night
The one I cling to through the ages

A name,
A hope,
A soul.

I speak to you in english,
I speak to you in french,
I speak to you in an unknowable language.

Be free,
Don’t go.

I admire your wings,
I admire your speed.
I admire your envol,

Yet my heart breaks.

Be free,
Don’t go.

What would I do if,

The glow I bask in,
The beam I cling to,
The flame I flicker to,

Vanishes?

I am trapped,

Like a singing bird in a cage.
Like a fragrant rose in a firm hand,
Like a light drunk moth in a candle blaze.

Love is a madly rushing stream,
Tenderness is a gently cooling breeze,
Softness is a warm and fragrant soil.

A cloak,
A cabin,
A shelter.

Wide open windows,
Wide open doors,
Wide open hands.

To love is to set free.

Be free,
Be you,
Be.

As I quietly pray that

You always remember,
You always pray,
You always return.

03/08/20

Last night,

There’s something I wanted to tell you
There was something I wanted to share with you.
There was something I wanted to greet you with.

But there were miles and miles,
But there were hours and hours,
But there were words and words,

Between us.

Instead I told you

Good morning,
Good night,
May God keep you.

Every syllable
A glimmer.

Every letter
A spark

Every breath
A gem.

So many things I wanted to say
So many things I wanted to give
So many things I wanted to share

So I keep them,

In a nest of twigs
In a chest of iron,
In a treasure box.

Cast into the sea
Cast into the desert
Cast into space.

Never to be found.
Never to be beholden.
Never to be known.

Do you wonder,

Dear heart,
Dear love,
Dear wing,

about the words I never speak?

Do they carry the same weight
Do they carry the same worth
Do they carry the same depth

as those promises you never make?
as those confessions you never share?
as those confidences you never breathe?

Do they?
Do they my dear?

Something beautiful happened to me
Something rare happened to me
Something precious happened to me.

By the door,
By the by,
By the steps,

I found a fledging.

Struggling
Straggling
Stammering,

So sweet,
So soft,
So small.

Vulnerable.

I held it in my hand
I cradled it in my hand
I sheltered it my hand.

What to do?
Where to go?
What to say?

Oh my baby
Oh my hope
Oh my heart

don’t be afraid.

Dear Lord,
Dear Sustainer,
Dear Keeper,

Help me help it.

I made a nest,

Out of straw,
Out of despair,
out of love

Its mother

Flying to and fro
Chirping high and low
Fluttering there and here.

I cannot fly
I cannot reach
I cannot leave

Like they do.

I am but human
I am but a woman.
I am but a girl,

Shivering,
Begging,
Whimpering,

Freedom,
Home,
Freedom.

Quivering with life,
Shivering with thirst,
Palpitating with anticipation.

There was a bird in my hand.

How miraculous
How beautiful
How sad!

The next morning

Took the bird away
Took the fledging away
Took the hope away.

Did it fly?
Did it die?
Did it cry?

The bird has flown.

I am silent.
You are silent.
There’s only silence.

Where to now?

26/06/20 Morn

Soft raindrops on the balcony,
A shivering feather on the foliage,
Crimson petals on the tiles,


Is it a gust of wind,
Or is it the breeze?


Is it a wave of cold,
Or is still still summer?


The sparrows are bickering on the bush,
The great tits are wondering on the lilac bough,
The doves are whispering on the cherry tree.


Leaves shivering,
Feathers fluttering,
Petals scattering,


Can I still smell the honeysuckle?
Can I still smell the eucalyptus?
Can I still smell the winter jasmine?


I don’t know.


Lost between imagination and reality
Lost between intuitions and facts,
Lost between the world and the invisible,


I never know.


I just follow the trail.
I just follow the call.
I just follow the breeze.


If I sit really quiet,
Will the sunshine return?


If I stand really still,
Will the birds return?


If I founder really slow,
Will the butterfly return?


Listen my love,


The blackbirds still greets,
The sparrows still chirp,
The swallows still sigh,


Although the sun is veiled.


My gentle wing,


Will you return to my words?
Will you return to my songs?
Will you return to my garden?


This month our table is laden with cherries
Next month our plates will be laden with blackberries
Next season our baskets will be laden with grapes.


The roses are weeping petals,
The hydrangea are promising rosy days.
And the daisies never fade.


But you are quiet,
So quiet.


But you are cautious,
So cautious.


But you are silent,
So silent.


Will you return?

26/06/20


Summer is


Sinking into my skin
Covering my hair
Swirling in my stomach


Like golden tendrils.
Like crimson bursts
Like velvet silk.


Warm,
Blinding
Soft, so soft…


They warn me…


Storm is brewing.
Clouds are gathering.
Lightning is winding.


The storm will come.


Will my heart break,
Will my soul quiver,
Will my dreams crumble,


Tell me, love, will I die this time?


I do not fear the blinding sparks,
I do not fear the torrential downpour,
I do not fear the heart thumping racket,


I fear silence.
I fear the dawn,
I fear the emptiness.


Summer filled blue haze,
Thunder filled dark foreboding,
Rain sodden wispy hope.


Will you stay?


While the storm rages,
While the windows tremble,
While the doors are slammed,


Will you stay?


Or will you remain


A draft 
A thought
A regret


I cling to when I cannot sleep?


Even in the middle of the night,
It’s palpable


Even in the darkest hours,
It’s glowing.


Even in the coolness of dawn,
It’s burning.


Burning,


My heart
My soul
My mind.


I cannot escape


This glare,
This heat,
This scent,


You’re everywhere
Even when you’re not here.


You’re everything,
Even when you’re not here.


You are every breath,
Even when you’re not here.


Not here,
There.


Not here,
Over tere.


Not here,
Over and over that way.


Far away,
Never here.


But you never leave…


The moon will wane and wax,
The heat will  drop and rise,
The wave will splatter and crest


You will leave and you will return.
You will deny and you will confess.
You will take a step back and a step further.


You will return.


In the balmy evenings of summer
In the deliciously fresh dawn.
In the ever glowing afternoons.


And you will stay…


Will you?